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The poem "I Nedd You" by Jerry and Barbara Cook conveys a better picture of what marrige is really all about:
Sunday, July 23, 2006 8:51 PM
I need you in my times of strength abd in my weakness; I nedd you when you hurt as much as when I hurt. There is no longer the choice as to what we will share. We will either share all of life or be fractured persons. I didn't marry you out of need or to be needed We were not driven by instincts or emptiness; We made a choice of love. But I think somthing supernatural happens at the point of marriage commitment (or maybe it's actually natural) A husband comes into existence; a wife is born. He is a whole man before and after, but a point in time he becomes a man who also is a husband; That is-a man who need his wife. She is a whole woman before and after. But from now on she needs him. She is herself But now also port of a new unit. Maybe this is what it means in saying "What God hath joined together." Could it be He really does somthing special at "I do"? Somthing like His creation of a mother when a woman gives birth; (somthing so real that neither can quite survive again without each other). Joining togethe-in marriage- two self-sufficient beings into an interdependence so real That when you hurt I hurt (there's nothing I can do about it!) Your despair is mine even if you don't tell me about it. But when you do tell, the sharing is easier for me. (To know why I hurt, no matter how frighting the cause, is easier then living with the theories that fear suggests.) And you also can then share from my strength in that weakness. If we are one then perhaps you don't always carry the antibodies within yourself to fight every infection.
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